I honestly don’t know what the hell I’m doing here.
These past couple of months I park my ass at my window with a smoke sorting out thoughts that go through my skull faster then the Kingda Ka ride at Six Flags. The brain slows down for a little bit when I start thinking about work ; how much quiet time I have before the baby wakes up; why musicians are worth and loved more when they’re dead; and when I’m going to be in my coping phase of my father’s death.
A shitload of more thoughts pile up on top of those and I want to say “PAUSE!…FOR 5 FUCKIN MINUTES, JUST PAUSE!” But of course, there’s no pause button in life. Just an “end” button that comes unexpectedly.
Call this my own self medication. Call it my “emo-diary”. Call it my public punching bag. Whatever you want to call it, I personally could care less what others opinions are. At the end of the day these thoughts are Mine and to quote a good friend: “Everyone is entitled to My Opinion.”